For She's a Jolly Good Fellowwwww....

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!

It’s the year of the Fire Pig and apparently very good for the Fire Dragon – in case anybody is wondering – that would be moi! And my friends – Lisa, Thinki, Melin and Szup.

I can’t wait for the Chinese New Year to start and that should be Feb 18 2007! I must say looking back on the year of the Dog, the very antithesis of the Dragon, it wasn’t a very bad year – sure it wasn’t as smooth sailing as it could have been, it wasn’t as dry-eyed as it could have been and I sure as hell wasn’t as happy as I could have been, should have been, would have been but all that is in the past and I am extremely gung ho about the new year.

New Year = New Life!

I finally feel like I have exorcised some demons and I can’t believe it’s taken me so long. I have only just read Amber Chia’s revelation of August 2006 in The Star Online, that she had broken up with her boyfriend of 9 years and that took her 5 weeks to get over and 6 months to announce. I cannot believe it takes one 5 measly weeks to realize there is life after the demise of a 9 year relationship. I am not, repeat not!, bashing Amber. It’s just that my experience with it was tremendously different and I can only wish I woke up 5 weeks after my break up to think, hey man, I’m ready for a new man, a new love, there is life after all! I don’t think I felt that after 5 MONTHS!

Anyway, to each her own. She’s probably stronger, emotionally, than me.

I have learnt lots last year, it was a great year at work – I became a wonderful people manager which again is a vast improvement from 2006; but I have an extra special feeling about 2007. I really do! I think its time I caught up with life again – after having wasted more than a year of precious days not really being all that I could be. As my sis says – When you walk through hell, you’ll be stronger. I love that – I think I will print it out and frame it up.

The frequency, or should I say infrequency (if there is such a word), of my blogs, demonstrates my crazy work schedules and lazy weekends. It’s been madness at work. I have met some new people (and yes, by that I mean men) this year, who have all been nice but somehow we have not clicked. Do I not know what I am looking for or Do I know TOO WELL what I am looking for? Anyway, I wasn’t in the right frame of mind for a new relationship, heck even for men! But now, …….I’m thinking it could be nice to meet somebody worthwhile again…..I know! I’m blushing!

A big fat shout out to all the people who have made a difference in my life this past year – without some of you, life and work would have been duller and less meaningful. Tibet was crazy, China was fun, my diamonds and sapphires are beautiful, Taiwan was great for shoes AGAIN!, gorgeous hairstyle, fabulous friends, tempting food, striking eyes, tight and toned body and a few more experiences I can’t really talk about on the blog !

Get a move on – time’s a running!

P.S. Auntie Irene, I have not checked my email in 3 months – yes I am THAT busy!, but HAPPY NEW YEAR to you and Uncle Ram and the family.

P.S.S. I have just gone back to read some of my old blogs. Apologies for all the mis-spellings, I sometimes type too fast for my own good and am too lazy or too out of time to re-read and correct.

Friends are Da Bomb!

Guess what people! This is a story of gross negligence! I am trying to get to KLIA this Thursday, trying to either reserve a taxi/limo. So of course, I turn to the Internet the best way to speedily dig out information. Not accurate information, mind you but at least information!

So I went to How To Get To Kuala Lumpur International Airport (KLIA) which sounds so simple and accurate. I get very happy when I find out that I can take a bus from Hentian Duta to KLIA and back (return journey) for only RM34!!!! I am ecstatic seeing as I will be paying NTD1000 for 1 airport transfer in Taiwan.

But smart Errolyn thought, hmmm, I wonder if they still do this – so smart Errolyn decides to call the numbers that are so efficiently displayed in the page. I call Hentian Duta Head Office TWICE and the nice woman on the other end told me “Nombor ini tidak dalam perkhidmatan. The number you have called is not in service.” Well duh!!!!! Of course it’s not in service, it’s only the listed number for the Hentian Duta Head Office! What could I have been expecting??

So, one down, another one to go – Errolyn calls the KLIA Bus Branch and this time a genuine woman answered and told me they have stopped the Hentian Duta bus service and the only way I could get to KLIA was to take the KLIA Express from KL Sentral.

The website above seems to be a non-governmental website which offers travel packages and information about Malaysia as a premier tourist destination for 2007. It’s endorsed by Tourism Malaysia.

I love my country, and I want my country and fellow countrymen in the service industry to improve. If you have a website that proclaims to offer information and services, please ensure that updated information and services are available! The next step is for Tourism Malaysia to add to their To Do List to check the sites that they do indeed endorse, because there is nothing as embarrassing as having old or worse! wrong information being touted by irresponsible service providers who then emblazon a giant sign that says ‘Endorsed by Tourism Malaysia’.

Lessons learnt : (you know you’ve been a ‘Corporate’ too long when you use phrases like ‘Lessons Learnt’ without falling over and laughing)

*Never trust everything you read until you check it out
*You can get to KLIA via KLIA Express (37 mins), KLIA Transit (much longer cos the train’s like the metro/subway/underground/LRT/MRT that stops everywhere), family/friend, normal taxi (which probably costs a bomb), KLIA Limo (very reliable, seems to be honest unscary men)
*You need to spend a lot of money to get to KLIA
*When you have friends like Liz - who'll give you a lift to the airport, it's great!

Just Once in a Lifetime.....Just Once!

Hmmm, 2 months now is it – the lapse between blogs. Well, with handling some migration work, getting frustrated with Thai Airways and planning for my China - Tibet trip, I AM guilty of neglecting me blog.

It’s ironic that in my daily life, I plan almost every detail down to the T (now, that’s an exaggeration, the important details are planned down to the T) but it’s a wonder I cannot plan great holiday trip. And I mean great as in long time, covering wide expanses and many logistical nightmares kinda trip.

If not for Lisa, I wouldn’t have gone and driven around New Zealand and wouldn’t have gone on this China and Tibet trip too. Ok, I know Tibet is China but I say China-Tibet trip cos I went to ChengDu, China and Tibet, China so I have to remember it as such!

I was in charge of booking my own air ticket to China and already was getting all frustrated and stressed out when I realized that my CHEAP Thai Airways booking had 2 wait-listed legs of the 4 leg journey!!!! Nobody told me that! – I blame the girl entirely! Where is Customer Service when you expect it? And where you expect it!

Anyway, got on MAS and I wonder about their winning all sorts of awards – hmmmmmm…..something dodgy going on there. I have no compliments for them at all! From their hotline to their actual service on the plane – the pilots were good though! ;) But their postcard designs have not changed in 10 years!

So, anyway, I went to ChengDu (Sichuan Province – right smack in the middle of China) and met my friend who is working there, stayed for 3 days, visited:

1. Giant Buddha at Leshan (If you don’t know what I am talking about, watch the Cantonese movie starring Aaron Kwok and Cheng E-Kin Storm and Wind….or *(&^$*^&)
This was a couple of hours out of ChengDu and I went with 2 other friends, a wonderful funny girl and a cute arrogant guy. The Buddha was fantastic (you’ll be hearing a lot about Buddhism!!!!) and we just walked and walked and walked. There were Cave Tombs there as well. It’s like a park you have to pay an entrance fee for with temples and tombs and traditional fishing village and of course the Buddha.

2. Mt Emei which was an hour away from Leshan. We got there too late to go up the mountain which, if there are clouds and all that, looks like a slice of heaven. We got there by 5 or 6pm and the cable car up was closed already. I never went back cos am thinking if I take my parents to China in the future, the tours always include Mt Emei anyway so……

3. Dujianyan Irrigation System is an ancient system built by the Emperor of China, showing great understanding, skill and manipulation of nature. In summer, when water levels are different and flow differently, the are certain checks and balances to irrigate farming fields and in winter, to prevent flooding!!!!!!! Expensive though – 90yuan (RM45) to get in but it is huge.

4. Panda Breeding Base – very nice! This is the one near to ChengDu, not the far away one. But you don’t get to touch or take pics WITH the pandas.

Lesson Learnt: In China, bring your student card – gets you in to places at half price!

Then after 3 days in ChengDu, it was off to Tibet. Together with my friend’s friends from the Philippines, all 8 of us flew off to Lhasa. Loved meeting everyone – Ron, Alex, Chrisma, Sharon and Mary Anne!

Tibet is a lot of green, brown, mountains, winding roads, high holy lakes, low holy lakes (although in actual fact there are only 3 Holy Lakes in Tibet), monasteries with monks (from the Red and Yellow Sect), small and large prayer wheels, accessories, tangkas (holy paintings) and ummmmm….., smelly, doorless toilets.

The toilets are slits in the ground which you squat over with no flush system and the complimentary maggots. I, of course, was not looking down for maggots otherwise I would not have gone to the bathroom at all in Tibet, except for the hotels, but my friend was ‘kind’ enough to tell me about them.

I was shocked the first time I saw the doorless toilets. I thought vandals had been in but apparently, you just get down to business, so to speak! Hahahahaha, after some time, it was a breeze. But always remember to bring SCENTED TISSUES with you to China!

Why? Cos in China, people do not flush tissue away and do not throw used ‘anything’s away out of sight. They have an open waste paper basket next to the squatee toilet, and EVERYTHING goes into it. Used, unused, yellow, white, red, brown, EVERYTHING! Use your imagination.

Highlights of Tibet:

1. Sky burials
2. Food (I didn’t like the yak butter milk though)
3. Giant gold stupas
4. Tangka
5. Lakes
6. Weather (16-18 degrees)
7. Natural toilets (just throw caution to the wind, squat behind a rock or a
bush and DO IT!!!!!, careful of the prickly bushes on your behind though!!!!)
8. Private praying session to the Sakyamuni Buddha in a chained up no access area
9. Lake Yamdrok
10. Lake Namcho

Lowlights of Tibet

1. LONG bus rides
2. Giant Cypress Tree in Lingzhi – the ONLY thing in Lingzhi
3. Altitude sickness (which some people, BESIDES me, had – needed oxygen!)
4. Spitting
5. People who have no sense of personal space or manners when roughly pushing you aside
6. Too much of the same thing/scene
7. Lack of coffee. But there is this really cute Summit Café in Lhasa near
where Dunya is that is very Starbucks like. Good to go for some java and mat
salleh friends, and books to exchange (bring 2 for 1)
8. Dunya Restaurant – TERRIBLE management and RUDE Owner. My friend was VERY upset but yes, the servers
speak English. I don't know how much of a Tibetan experience it was - having red wine with your yak burger.....hmmmmm.....

So, after Tibet, I went back to ChengDu for 1 week and had a great time at the ChengDu Wildlife World (safari), EATING (baby lobsters are great – I had to go back for a repeat), Xinjian Mutton Kebabs!

I went too, to Tesco, to buy milk and some ham and bread and snacks for breakfast.

Then there is the great experience of Rang Fang Jie and He Hua Je!!!!!!!!! Ah! Shopping paradise! Clothes, shoes, accessories, household stuff, decorative stuff, baskets, paintings – anything you want, you can find it there for less than RM20! I bought 5 rings, some bracelets and earrings and necklaces. I bought 2 beaded beautiful lamps for RM70 each. The 2 are a must visit – unless you only have time (and by that I mean a minimum of 1 day), then go to He Hua Je. They open at 5am until 4pm.

I had my friend’s driver so it was very easy – just tell him where to go and when to come back and get you.

By the way, if you don’t speak Mandarin, it’s going to be a TAD difficult. I can’t speak it but I can bargain in it so I was pretty ok.

By the way, bargaining in China and Tibet – like Petaling Street but up it a notch or two. And walk away if they don’t give you the price you want – but walk slowly and keep your ears open for them to call you back. If several shops don’t call you back to give you the price you want, you know you’ve got to up it a little!

Have FUN!

P.S. Caught LiT performers in an Accapella show the other night – ‘FANG’TASTIC! Everybody should go – they are very good singers with a bucketload of showmanship!

So many things, so little time....

I had so many ideas of thoughts and opinions (even anecdotes) I wanted to share with everybody in the past few weeks but then I never get the time to log in and write.

I wanted to write about The Power of Love.....of Religion. I've seen a couple of friends fall by the wayside and even had one tell me (from the horse's mouth) that why she faltered when hard times came along is because she didn't have religion while I did (She had asked me how I got over my personal 'tragedy'). Now you know I am the last one to preach but I think it's true. I know that whatever decisions I have made and all actions I have taken have mostly at some point or another come from my faith in my religion. When I faltered, when I regretted, when I cried, when I was broken, I just went back to my religion and draw strength from that. I do not know if it is 200 percent right or true but everyone needs something to hold on to. And god knows, I have been broken lots this past year. Why? Because I have a naive, idealistic view of people I love - that they can do no wrong, or that they would never hurt others knowingly, that they would put others first before themselves but it's not (always) true.

However, I WILL NOT let that change my beliefs or my principles. I will still continue to be strong, to put others I love first before myself simply because I cannot hope to do otherwise. Even if I wanted to, I couldn't. I guess that's the difference - I couldn't even if I wanted to - naivete to the highest extreme but what the heck, it's me!

I have a simplistic view of people in my life - those that are important to me and those who aren't. Those who are, I cannot turn my back on them no matter the expense to myself, those who aren't, ....I don't really think about. Maybe it's because I do not expend much time and effort on those who aren't important to me that I have the luxury of always thinking of those who do.

So, it's actually a nice chemistry and combination of religion and personal ideals (do no evil, be good, have a good heart, do unto others what you would have others do unto you - can I say the same thing in more different ways???), that brings me to myself. A self I have discovered at 30! I have been told I have a soft heart and a tough exterior. Is that true? For you to find out.

(For those of you who are thinking, I am not writing very well or cohesively tonight - yes, it's because I'm tired, apologies)

Another thing I wanted to talk about is Local TV. Number one - the variety and multitude of bland reality shows available. Somebody ought to stop all these singing competitions. I had a terrible time with Malaysian Idol 2 and now with One in A Million (of which I think either Dayang should win or one of the boys - only happened to catch one episode) and Protege and Mentor and Akademi Fantasia and Digiteen and Celcomteen and all that crap. Come on man, although I must say the talent levels of Protege and AF are better than Malaysian Idol or OIAMillion. But nobody does anything differently. They're all the same, there is no ooomph, no style, no wow factor - though at least Protege and Mentor and AF teach the kids, the whole works so they understand what it is to be a performer instead of just walking out on stage and singing.

Heck, if Amazing Race can get boring, then you better believe it that these singing thingies have a much earlier expiry date!!!!

Gol and Gincu is quite cool though - the other day I watched this episode where Putri said 'I can trust Eddy, he will never hurt me' and actually blurted out laughing! Of course I had the omnipresence of a tv watcher but girls say these inane things all the time, I've been guilty of it, but now I know better! And then at the end of the episode......she goes 'How could I have been so stupid??!!!' Join the club girl! I've been there too!

This reminds me of an old Chinese saying, 'You can never say a man is good or bad until the four nails in his coffin have been nailed down'. Lord, is that true or what??!! See, there is wisdom in old wives' tales.

At lunch the other day too, a friend told me, never trust a man completely, never have expectations that are too high of him. Is that true? I'm sure it is, but how can I love a man and not trust him? How can I build a life with somebody and not expect him to be good/great? Because I can only expect him to reach and aim for higher than where he is now right - which should be pretty good in itself already if I chose to be with him......I cannot love at 90 percent! I must love at 130 percent but ''that will only get you hurt!!!'' friends lament!

Bleah - men, relationships - if you're looking for lovey dovey mushy stuff here on this website, you gotta wait a while. Because where I am now, no man can be trusted to put someone else first before them when the going gets tough - like a friend said, it's prioritisation (I believe it's true so I'm sharing it), he'd rather hurt you than himself.

Hopefully, one day I will stop being distrustful (just a teeny bit, mind you) of men out there and meet someone who can put these fears to rest. And I will read back on my blogs and think, I wrote with a tinge of disappointment, unhappiness, sore-ity (hahahaah) but I am glad to have been proven wrong.

By the way, about TV still - I love Lee Hom. Never noticed him before but a Chinese guy who is good looking, stylish and speaks wonderfully.....it's not just 'Celcom, the power is in your hands', but 'I am in your hands!'. Hahahahahhaahahaaa, don't be shocked! If you work with you, you will know I talk like this everyday at lunch!

Props out to Szu Ping whom I did not mention in my last blog for wishing me happy birthday - sorry darling! I saved the best for last!

I want a puppy! My friend gave me these 'out of this world' earrings for birthday, they are too precious! When I get my own notebook, I will start putting more pics up and then everyone can envy my gorgeous earrings and hair and self.....ahahahahahhaa..

By the way, travelling soon, can't wait! TIBET!!!!!!!!!!! It's going to be good!

Desperately Seeking Murli!!!!

Hey man, call me - number is still the same (maybe)....but anyway, I have no way of getting in touch with you - no email address. But yes let's meet first weekend of Sept right? Mmmmm....write to my yahoo.

Lessons in Life

Well, I have now officially joined the 30 Club! (Just type 'turning 30' in google and be entertained!) It's something that I am the first to do among my close circle of school friends. Not the first time I am celebrating a birthday without them by my side, not the first time I am spending a birthday without my family by my side but the first time I am celebrating a birthday without a man by my side. (To feminists out there who are already yelling ‘You don’t need a man to be happy’ or tuning in to the PussyCat Dolls song ‘I Don't Need A Man', yes I know I don’t need a man to be happy but for better and not worse ((hehe)) I would prefer to have the one I love by my side). And for something that’s not happened in the last 17 years, it took a little getting used to.

But anyhoo, it was a very nice birthday. I had a great confirmation of love and respect from my team members at work – now for those of you who remember last year, the atrocities I used to grumble about regarding work, they’ve all taken a turn for the better this year and I am so grateful for it. I couldn’t bear to take on personal and professional problems together this year of the Dog 2006! And I had like a million friends who all took the time and effort to remember my birthday and wish me – props to Lisa, Melinda, Thing May, Janice, Mum (but not DAD!!!!), Shanthi, Liz, Sookie, Anizah, Adzam, Kong Wai, Fungky, Cynthia, David A, Anita Abdul Rahim (whom I have not heard from in AGES!!!!), Mark B, Elene, Mei, Chitra, Sri, Ayn, Trish, Sherine, Shamini, Ashifa, Amutah, Logs, PY, Audrey, Jim, Shanthi N, Amy, Wendy……………..

It’s like I told Anizah, I may have lost 1 person but its opened up a whole new world of friends to me. I am blessed to have the friends that I have and for them to come out in full force to show me the impact I have made on their lives is greatly fulfilling.

I also see a difference in my appreciation of my friends these days – I used to be completely wrapped up in 1 person, my life revolved around him, my schedule revolved around him, my habits and hobbies revolved around him but now, I do charity work, I go clubbing (sometimes), I go to the gym, I read more, I do my laundry more regularly (hehehehe). I get to make the time to do what I need to do basically, instead of trying to steal time from my time with him to do normal stuff. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t regret it, I loved spending time with him but being without him now, gives me much more opportunity to do what I want to do and what I need to do. I’m sure my employer prefers it more this way too – since I don’t rush off from work the moment I can, to go home to him.

Sure it gets lonely or boring sometimes but you win some and you lose some eh?

So I had some birthday songs, a cake, some gifts, some cards, it was fantastic. I was rushing around work a lot too – everybody needed something done……, so it felt like an extremely fruitful day which makes me feel GLAD TO BE ALIVE AND 30!!!!!!!

Yesterday too, the Corporate Social Responsibility Club organized an AIDS Awareness Week at the office and I helped sell quite a bit of merchandise of which the proceeds go to the Malaysian Aids Foundation – MAF. Our Club also wants to print up our own AIDS Support t-shirts for sale and some of the slogans we came up with/found, I felt were so fantastic I would have bought every t-shirt design. For example:

Don’t Be A Fool, Cover Your Tool
Stigmatisation = Discrimination
Support Malaysian Agriculture, Use a Rubber

These are just some.

I must confess a Boo Boo I committed when helping out at a Charity Sale for the Spastic Children’s Association of Selangor and Federal Territory. I was looking for a plastic bag to pack all the merchandise this woman had bought from us. I found one ratty looking one under the table and I wondered aloud if she would mind it being a little ‘cacat’. She took offense (albeit very gracefully and politely) at the word ‘cacat’ because apparently her daughter was afflicted with a “Big Head”. She called her daughter ‘Special’ and I guess that is the politically correct term.

I felt terrible having used the C word but looking at the other side of the coin, I don’t think it actually matters that much what people call it (the condition). What matters most is what your loved ones and yourself think. For argument’s sake, (and I know I may get a lot of hate mail for this but bear with me and reserve comment for now) if people deem it a cacat condition, then yes, fine, cacat. What is so wrong or bad about this word? Poor word I think, because it was coined for everyday usage, never intending for itself to be a pariah among other words but its maker (people) has made it so.

(Killing myself here but) Some definitions from online BM dictionaries:

Cacat =
defective; handicapped; deformed
disabled, defect, flaw, blemish

I think the more people accept a certain condition and accept that ‘a rose by any other name would smell as sweet’, we would live easier lives. A word is a word is a word. There is nothing good or bad about it except the connotation and definition that people give to it. Everybody has flaws and defects – however, of course, there is the severity of the defect that is important here and how much it impacts the quality of life of the inflicted person. But still, a flaw and a defect is a fact of life. You cannot pretend it isn’t there – just like AIDS and TB and Leprosy…..- the best thing you can do for people who have ‘special’ conditions is to accept them as they are, treat them as you would everybody else and help each other when help is asked for.

Laziness is a flaw, lying is a flaw, inconsideration is a defect, having a ‘heart of stone’ is a defect……see my point?

FYI: Did you know that in some parts of the US, ‘special’ means dumb or mentally slow, but used as a slang word?

(A word to all those who are now itching to comment on my blog and give me a piece of their mind – I will not be responding to your comments because I have said what I have to say and I believe in it. As is my motto always, there are only a handful of people in the world whose opinions I really care about.

I did not intend to disrespect anybody with my thoughts and comments above and I am appreciative of and sensitive to the conditions some people are in – however, I think physically challenged people do get on with their lives very well and they have come to accept themselves, perhaps you ought to too!

I am never sure when to offer help and when not to though, because sometimes you can get your head bitten off – “Why would you think I need your help???”)

Amour

I'm in Love!

The past two times this has happened, it's come more slowly but this time I just saw and then the first thought that came to my mind was "I'm In Love!"

I love this book called Bet Me by Jenny (Jennifer) Crusie. The way it is written is fantastic - I love the way the two leads spar with each other and the wittee repartee keeps you turning page after page after page. I tried to get my then-boyfriend to read it (as part of a "let's try to read a book the other found fascinating to further build our bond of understanding and closeness") so that I could in one fell swoop, do the above paranthesized as well as get him to talk to me the way Calvin talks to Minerva (funny name I know).

Anyhoo - he didn't get around to it. And I had my own 'Off Limits' books because he had tried to get me to read this 'love letters from a man in harvard/oxford or something' which started off really boring.

Anyhoo (2) in 'Bet Me', both Calvin (male protagonist) and Min/Stats (female protagonist) has Fate telling them, drumming into their heads "THIS ONE!" whenever they see each other. You see, they keep trying to ignore and deny the delicious pull the universe has placed on both of them. Cutting the long story short - when I saw this one, Fate didn't say "This One" but "I'm In Love".

Up to you to decide which one is better!

[Big Smile now]

All The Men In My Life…..

It’s only been recently when I’ve had the full force of charming men visited upon me. Not the first time in my life a man has turned it on for me but the first time I’ve realised the effects of personality + charm + confidence at the same time!

Two men are involved here – both different but both confident in their own right and charmed the pants off of me (not literally though!!!) One is sweet and quiet (when it comes to sweet-talking me) and the other is outspoken, aggressive and rough! (My God! Now everyone will be wondering what the heck I’m talking about)

So anyways, the soft sweet one (whom I shall refer to as W henceforth) usually sits quietly beside me, which should be an indication in itself because he can be quite raucous and flirty. He quietly privately asks me how I am, if I am cold, if I need anything, if I need something to eat (I think it’s a Malaysian thing – if you care about someone, feed them). Which is all well and fine, but man oh man, when he starts the sweet talking – LOOK OUT! And he ‘whispers’ these sweet somethings with such quiet confidence and stability. The other day, when he was sitting beside me again, he asked, “What perfume are you wearing?”

“Miracle”
“I know.”
“How do you know?”
“Because you are one”

I was completely bowled over!!! It wasn’t exactly WHAT he was saying (because people can say all kinds of tacky things) but the way he said it. I got the impression he was so sure of what he was saying – like he absolutely believed it and therefore, so should I!!!!

BIG DISCLAIMER:
I am not saying this guy has got the hots for me or anything like that at all – but just needed to demonstrate the effects of someone’s charm/flirting/personality/confidence..

Now the other one – god! Was a train that knocked me over and made me blush!!!! Now, if you’ve seen me before, you’ll know I’m quite tanned – so it took some heck of an effort to make me blush!

Anyways, I met him (P) at an important gathering – this is a guy I’ve met before whom I thought, and shared with my family, was good looking. It’s been a few years since and we both actually didn’t recognize each other. But then we were introduced……….

He started to take pictures of me – made a point of asking me if he could (which is cool) and didn’t over do it at all (which is cooler). Then during the wedding, he came over and wanted to share a toast with me. It didn’t help that his dad was sitting with us (if you know what I mean). Anyways, I saw him headed in my direction and being the shy one that I am, I looked away. He strode purposefully towards me, leaned over and raised his glass. Dad said something embarrassing of course, as parents often do when their child gets together with someone of the opposite sex!

He said (something like), “Errolyn, will you drink with me?” looking straight at me like nothing else in the room mattered.

“I don’t drink …..” while raising my glass of ice water.
“Come, let’s share” while he tried to pour some wine into my glass (granted this was gauche but maybe he wanted to dilute the wine since I don’t drink eh?)

Drops of wine fall onto my brand new dress –

“Oh, I’m so sorry” and used his hand to wipe away at the errant 3 drops of wine on my thigh.
“Let’s drink”

And so we did.

And then the night went on. At goodbye, he clasped my hand and the first thing I thought was “Damn, his hand is rough”. I like it when a man is a man and the rough hand and confident, almost cocky attitude, made me think terrible thoughts! HAHAHAHAHAHAH.

So there you go, W and P, such different styles but applied with just the right amount of nerve and sincerity that it comes across as perfectly enticing and heart-warming. I don’t advocate that men go out on the town and do this to every girl they come across, of course – unless they want to get the girl!!!!

Another thing that is wonderful, is when P held my hand at goodbye and would not let go even though I was trying to get my phone to put his number in!! He did the ‘no one else in the room’ look again and I giggleddddddddd!

Sorry though, it won’t work for every guy – because sometimes the girl is just going to go: get your bloody hand off me!!! But these guys had it perfect and I just had to share the knowledge around because so many men these days do not know how to get it right!

Some men just don’t inspire you at all but are comfortable so you continue to hang out with them sometimes, some make you feel all sexy and it seems like all you do is flirt outrageously and some just make you understand why they are still single!!!!

Oh by the way, of course, the disclaimer goes for P too.

And if W or P is reading this - thank you guys for a wonderful experience!

And oh yes, P definitely invaded my space but for some strange reason - I enjoyed it!

P.S. For the men who are still blur - the italicised phrases are the actions that got to me!

A Red Bomb....as the Chinese say....

On Wed I attended a friend’s wedding. You know how people always say weddings are joyous occasions and how it’s fantastic that two people are now joined in their love for eternity in the eyes of God and Country? Well, this was truly a wedding epitomizing the sentiment – and I’m not being a mushy cry baby (the way I usually am… at weddings….)

This was a simple beautiful ceremony with lots of white roses and the bride swathed in a luxurious cream and maroon brocade sari which sparkled with the lights. Although none of them sparkled more brightly than the bride. Her relief when sitting down on the stage was apparent – it came out as a deep breath and a look of : “Aaah, I’m finally here”. And then the Shania Twain song, “You’re Still The One” starts playing and I immediately find my throat constricting and the tears pooling.

It helps when you know the history of the couple – especially this one who have been together for 10 years and finally getting to the altar was a big momentous giant step for them, the family, the friends and even the Bahai’ community. As the father of the groom said, “So many delegations have come to us to ask for this union to happen”. It is always joyously heartening to finally have a union happen.

Marriage isn’t always good. I have seen so many marriages fall apart and I firmly believe it is because the parties involved did not put in as much as they wanted out of it. Many a time, naïvete fools individuals in love into thinking that love is enough to make a marriage work – it isn’t!

Marriage is WORK and you better believe it. Marriage is also RISK and no one can guarantee that it will be good. What can be promised is that you will work at it. It’s too easy to give up nowadays – divorce lawyers abound, ‘friends’ who are looking to ‘help’ you out, impatient parents. It could all very well be well-meaning but sometimes married people just need a good kick in the ass!!!!!!!! Wake up and look at what you’ve made your marriage into – oftentimes a JOKE, that’s what it is!

You promise to love and honour and (ahem) share mutual decisions with another human being; if you haven’t been doing that 120%, then the marriage falling apart is YOUR fault! Do not blame others!

But when a love (and all the other parts of a successful marriage like respect, admiration, humour, chemistry, passion etc) is good, then Marriage is wonderful! Granted, I have not really come across a rarity such as this but I’m sure it is good. Even though I have not experienced a good marriage, but I have experienced good loves.

So, coming back to my initial story – This was one wedding where the love of the couple and their family and friends was so apparent, it would have been a shame not to have shed a few tears of joy for them. It was also touching that there could have been a hall of at least 80 people who were overjoyed that this couple could finally be together to build a life and a family. So many people can’t be wrong if they believe that your love is true and you are (nothing as tacky as being meant to be together) the best possible match for each other.

Mmmmmm……I feel it again now.

Congratulations Jothee and Taraz! My bestest wishes with you.

Manila - Land of the ????

I’ve just returned from Manila, the Philippines and I shall not return again. (Only smart people can make sense of the preceeding sentence!)

Yes, I spent 5 days, 4 nights in Manila, first in Simpaloc, then in the Ermita. Simpaloc is rather out of the happening radius so after spending our first night there in a prebooked room, the 4 adventurous girls moved to Stone House Ermita. It cost us RM17.00 each. I shan’t bore you with the details of the rooms but needless to say the 4 girls decided, “Heck! We’re managers – we can afford to pay more than RM17 for a nice room and so off we trudged…..yet again….in search of a RM50 room.

We found this in the CityState Hotel which seems to be a hub for ‘strangers in the night passing each other blowing horns and letting off steam’. Hahaahahhaaaa. Seems like lots of mat sallehs like having 2 Filipinas with them to eat breakfast.

Things I have done in the Philippines:

1. Visited world’s smallest active volcano – Taal Volcano located in Taal Lake.
2. Drove around Tagaytay (where Taal is located) approximately 2 hours looking for Leyla Restaurant where our packaged lunch is.
3. Shopped in Divisoria Market where 168 Shopping Mall is.
4. Changed accommodation 3 times in Manila itself.
5. Rode in a taxi, bus, jeepney (think long tut-tut) and tricycle
6. Got cheated by vehicle (taxi and jeepney) operators in our routes to hotels and airport.
7. Shopped in a souvenir shop called Tesoro near the CityState Hotel.
8. Had somebody tell me I was beautiful in Tagalog.
9. Had a bell boy look at me like I was in one of those perfume ads (where the guy tries hard to continue to stay and look and smile while a friend tries to pull him away)
10. Had almost everyone in Manila start speaking to me in Tagalog (my standard answer is: “No Tagalog”).
11. Changed USD to more pesos.
12. Ridden horseback up a mountain in a cut in sleeveless tank.
13. Get tan lines
14. Ruined my hair in the Hard Water.


Things I have not done in the Philippines:

1. Eaten Balut.
2. Visited Intramuros, Rizal Park, Cathedrals, Churches….
3. Lived the good life.
4. Experienced the night life.
5. Visit Boracay Beach.
6. Visit Casino Filipina.

Guess it looks like a pretty worthwhile trip huh? But still I wouldn’t go back. I don’t mean to sound arrogant or elitist or anything like that but it was poor, dirty and even scary at times.

Poor:
· Woman and 2 children sleeping in a tricycle by the wayside reeking of urine. The children are clothed but have no shoes and are asleep in that half closed eye manner that a lot of lost children have.
· Men, women and children living/sleeping at railroad tracks near Divisoria Market.
· Men huddled around a couple of fried fishes in the dark eating rice with their hands.
· Teenage boy coming up to you and following you aways to beg for the food you ‘ta-pau-ed’, ‘bungkus-ed’, packed from dinner.

Dirty:
· Woman and 2 children sleeping in a tricycle by the wayside reeking of urine.
· The unrelenting heat and sun making you sweat gallons. I FELT DIRTY AND STICKY so much of the time that I will always associate that with Manila.
· Open jeepneys and low-slung tricycles expose you and your skin to the air, smoke, dust, grime and god knows what else (trying very hard to not sound like a skincare ad but……)

Scary:
· Teenage boy coming up to you and following you aways to beg for the food you ‘ta-pau-ed’, ‘bungkus-ed’, packed from dinner.
· Men on the street calling you their girlfriend and/or sister.
· Getting lost among the market stalls in Divisoria and not knowing where is North, South, East and West, the Main Road, Taxi Land…….and having a million tricycle men telling you they can get you to wherever you need to go.
· Hand carrying 2 huge plastic bags of shopping and not knowing where your hotel is.
· Running out of money for shopping.
· Phillipine Idols auditioning everywhere – I MEAN everywhere – the market corner, the road side, eating places…….people just singing at the top of their baddish voices – I mean there aren’t too many Lea Salongas there from what I heard!

Manila reminded me of Old Delhi, electric cables abound, all tangled and exposed. Some parts of Metro Manila look war-torn, pillars half-broken off and jeeneys fighting for space on the roads. However, the good thing is that in spite of the jams and spewing black smoke, nobody curses or yells or shouts at another driver. It’s either that they’re so used to the situation already or they really are the HAPPY people they are claimed to be. It seems (from a native Filipino’s mouth) that they’ve gone through so much, poverty, political instability and etc. that nothing seems as bad as it may look.

By they way, Filipino definition of:
Butterfly – GROs who flit from man to man.
C*ck – no definition here but they have keychains shaped like the male appendage, ashtrays with it sticking right up in various sizes and god only knows what else. I never did find out the fascination with C*cks though.

…… :)

So....what is Manila the land of?